"You can't be a pirate if you haven't got a beard. I said so. MY boat, MY rules."
"You can stop clapping now if you want. Really. You'll need your energy for cheering me later. Shhhhhhhh. shhhhhhhh."
"Don't... Don't put the noodles and the dumplings together in the boat. They'll fight! The noodles are bullies. Poor dumplings."
"I haven't put on weight. Your eyes are fat."
"Don't leave the duck there. It's totally irresponsible. Put it on the swing, it'll have much more fun."
HAAAAAAAAAAAAA, just sooooo random!
These musings are all from the site Sleep Talkin Man. The premise is that the husband says some really crackhead things in his sleep; things he'd never ever say awake. His wife thought they were so hilarious that she started recording them so that she could post them on their blog the next morning. I'll warn ya - the things he says are a little rated R, but oh goodness, some of the stuff he says is just so random-funny!!